Personal transformation happens through authentic connection with others. When we feel loved, valued and included, we are empowered to find personal meaning and realize our greatest potential.
Sadly, many of us believe that we are alone in our uniqueness, in our vulnerabilities, in our failings; so we choose to isolate ourselves from others. We especially hide from those people we perceive as having their lives in better order, rather than exposing our weaknesses.
We let others know that life is going well for us and we are handling whatever challenges we face. When we say this inauthentically, we are left feeling more isolated and disconnected. The subjects of our inauthenticity are left feeling alone in their lives because a true connection has not been made.
The truth is all of us struggle with our own fears and shadows. We all worry about making the right choices and living life fully, yet we keep our secrets about possibly having blown it, to ourselves. At least from time to time we feel afraid or ashamed of being seen for who we are beneath the surface. We hide out and miss out on the ultimate tonic of true connection. When we choose not to reveal our true selves we inevitably deepen the feeling of alienation.
On the other hand, something happens when we share our true selves with another caring person. Our vulnerability melts away and our hearts open. More often than not we find that we are not alone in our fears. When we speak from our hearts, the light is shed and the shadows disappear for us as well as for the person with whom we share.
When we are willing to move through the darkness and reclaim our beauty and light that is our birthright something magical happens. Relief comes from sharing our truth, as does the realization that we are all struggling with the same questions about day-to-day struggles and the bigger questions in regards to the meaning of our lives. Sharing our joys and losses with another gives way to the awareness that we are in good company and on some deep level we are all the same.
We all need to be loved and valued to flourish and that happens when we allow ourselves to be authentic.
We hurt each other by being insincere and hiding our secrets and fears; and we all do it.
Notice what happens when you take a chance and reveal yourself to another.
Notice the relief that comes from being authentic and sharing your truth about your triumphs and losses.
Notice the opening it creates for the one you are sharing with as they come to life with their own stories of joy and sorrow.
We are all part of the same whole and sharing authentically is the way to find peace, love and transformation.
Can you recall an instance in which inauthenticity hindered your ability to make a connection with someone?
