What happens when you lose a good friend?
Good friends are the people that we choose to let in to the inner sanctum.
They make our lives sweeter during the good and difficult times. Friends are our supports and reality testers. We rely upon each other knowing that we’re safe to reveal our true selves.
A few nights ago a dear friend of mine died after a brief and horrible bout with cancer. We had deep bonds over the decades…though only intermittent contact. His death feels like a sucker punch.
Have you encountered a loss that shook you to the core?
As I scroll through our many experiences together I’m struck that our culture has no rituals in place for the loss of a friend. Rituals exist for those who mourn the loss of parents, partners, colleagues and God forbid children…but not for dear friends.
Losing a good friend…
The bond between friends can be life altering and has in fact been shown to be the key to health, happiness and longevity.
I’ve decided to light candles in his memory, say my prayers and share stories with a few people who knew him and others who simply have the capacity to listen generously.
Spending time with his family also feels healing—as we connect over our common love and loss. I’ve yet to journal but will… and in my heart I continue to honor the way in which he enriched my life.
Nothing is permanent.
What I know is that each friend matters and adds something unique to our lives. Continuing to nourish these vital relationships for as long as we can makes every day a little better.
How have you navigated through the loss of a dear friend?
As always I’d love to hear from you about your thoughts and comments below.
With love,
Randy
Good friends are the people that we choose to let in to the inner sanctum.
They make our lives sweeter during the good and difficult times. Friends are our supports and reality testers. We rely upon each other knowing that we’re safe to reveal our true selves.
A few nights ago a dear friend of mine died after a brief and horrible bout with cancer. We had deep bonds over the decades…though only intermittent contact. His death feels like a sucker punch.
Have you encountered a loss that shook you to the core?
As I scroll through our many experiences together I’m struck that our culture has no rituals in place for the loss of a friend. Rituals exist for those who mourn the loss of parents, partners, colleagues and God forbid children…but not for dear friends.
Losing a good friend…
The bond between friends can be life altering and has in fact been shown to be the key to health, happiness and longevity.
I’ve decided to light candles in his memory, say my prayers and share stories with a few people who knew him and others who simply have the capacity to listen generously.
Spending time with his family also feels healing—as we connect over our common love and loss. I’ve yet to journal but will… and in my heart I continue to honor the way in which he enriched my life.
Nothing is permanent.
What I know is that each friend matters and adds something unique to our lives. Continuing to nourish these vital relationships for as long as we can makes every day a little better.
How have you navigated through the loss of a dear friend?As always I’d love to hear from you about your thoughts and comments. You can simply reply directly to this email.
With love,Randy
Good friends are the people that we choose to let in to the inner sanctum.
They make our lives sweeter during the good and difficult times. Friends are our supports and reality testers. We rely upon each other knowing that we’re safe to reveal our true selves.
A few nights ago a dear friend of mine died after a brief and horrible bout with cancer. We had deep bonds over the decades…though only intermittent contact. His death feels like a sucker punch.
Have you encountered a loss that shook you to the core?
As I scroll through our many experiences together I’m struck that our culture has no rituals in place for the loss of a friend. Rituals exist for those who mourn the loss of parents, partners, colleagues and God forbid children…but not for dear friends.
Losing a good friend…
The bond between friends can be life altering and has in fact been shown to be the key to health, happiness and longevity.
I’ve decided to light candles in his memory, say my prayers and share stories with a few people who knew him and others who simply have the capacity to listen generously.
Spending time with his family also feels healing—as we connect over our common love and loss. I’ve yet to journal but will… and in my heart I continue to honor the way in which he enriched my life.
Nothing is permanent.
What I know is that each friend matters and adds something unique to our lives. Continuing to nourish these vital relationships for as long as we can makes every day a little better.
How have you navigated through the loss of a dear friend?As always I’d love to hear from you about your thoughts and comments. You can simply reply directly to this email.
With love,Randy
Hi Randy,
I love reading your emails. In a few seconds you help shift my perception, ground me in happiness and help me let go of my self doubt.
I wanted to share a few ways how I have handled and coped with my husbands death. He was my best friend and biggest supporter but I didn’t know it at the time. He was 49 when diagnosed with stage 4 prostate cancer and died at 53. The way I keep him alive and honor him is to stop and think what would he do, think or say in this specific situation. I don’t necessarily do whatever it is I’m doing his way; but by taking a moment to stop and think,I give myself the time to become grounded and gather his strength and positivity and use it for myself and my thinking. He was an incredible smart and funny guy. Often I find myself smiling and laughing out loud just by thinking about him. It’s been ten years since he died, I miss him and think about what would or could have been but mostly I feel gratitude and peace because he left me his strength and love of life when he died.
Thanks for asking the question and letting me share my thoughts with you.
Hi Wendy,
Thanks for your beautiful and vulnerable comments. Sounds to me that you’ve honored your husband’s life and your deep connection through these stories, memories and shared moments.
I’m glad that my emails give you strength. If you’d ever like to connect, do let me know.